Heartbreak Hotel

One of the topic that schools don't teach but the school of life teaches... is how to love.

We had our biggest tiff yesterday night, since we started dating 3 months back. 

And, B brought up the 2 words - 'break up'.

Throughout this past 3 months, I learnt a lot about myself and how ridiculous & vindictive I can become in a relationship.

It scares me, a lot. 

I realised I am very self-centered, and a relationship will always need compromise.

And, I need to mind my words.  Coz they do hurt, emotionally. 

Sometimes, I do wonder if I love him. 

If you love someone, why would you hurt them? 

Or is it because we do not know how to love them the way they understand? 

Love, is a loaded term. 

_____________________________________

After 3 weeks break, I will be going to my new workplace tmr!

Feeling extremely nervous, and my mental state is very bothered by B. 

He hasn't replied my msg for 3 hours.

I'm gonna wait it out, and trying hard to distract myself. 

All the best to me, jiayou!

03.08.17

Maybe someday I'll look back and realise its all a dream

But for now, let me relish, in this dream a bit longer... 

_______________________

Things have been looking up for me recently

After going for countless interviews, I have finally received a few offers.

But totally feeling a sense of deja vu coz is almost the exact same situation as 2 years back -.-''' 

C offered a position, with higher pay

but... I am more keen on the 2nd possible offer with A

And my reason is coz its nearer to my house (definite plus after 2 years of long distance to work)

Think, most likely will reject them tmr...

lol and my dad says after this round, maybe I shld not apply to them anymore coz its tiring for them too

hahaha

Here, have sent out the Staff Leaving Service email with my name

And ever since then, I feel like its the white elephant in the room 

Everyone knows but nobody dares to broach the topic 

Nevertheless, I am leaving with a peaceful heart

So much has changed in 2 years

HDB will always have a place in my heart, because of the people I met

And, it will always be my 初恋

Thank you, for everything.

Blank Spaces

Haven't posted in close to 2 months.
So much happenings, yet, many are lost in the blank spaces.

The biggest chunk of 2017 was spent with Alvin and his friends.
Through them, I learnt so much.  Although it was mostly fun & games, but I feel I have developed so much as a person.

I've lost so much (job, countless guys + friends).
But I feel I've gained so much more too... because I have grown as a person.

Growing up is so tough and a lonely journey.
I am going to miss everyone here - Kit, Clement, ShuXiong, Kitty Jie, Widya, Rachel etc
And most of all, Lao Ban Alvin.
I never knew we would become so close and he would play such a huge role in my growth.
When Anthony told me they will not be renewing or confirming me, lao ban told me - 你在HDB没遇到贵人。
Little does he know, he is my 贵人in life.

And... special mention to Bryan, Mr Blue.
Thank you, for everything.
Even though things did not end off well, I will remember you and the fun times.
Because of the many firsts, you played a huge part of my 2017 too.

Life, is full of surprises.
People I thought will stay forever, are no longer part of my journey.
I guess, that's what growing up is all about.

Saying hellos... and then goodbyes.

时不时

时不时的会想起你
也许，真的是得不到的，才最珍贵
因为，它永远保持了‘可能’的想象力

拥有，就是失去的开始。


什么时候我才有勇气去拥有呢？

Restaurant week 2017!

So... It's Restaurant Week again! 

And I went to try out FYR Cycene Ond Drinc with Hui Juan.

Haha how time flies, one year ago I went with her to Restaurant Week too...

Had their Pork Belly for appetiser! 

There was like this Maggi Mee crunch inside, and I was supposed to eat it crushed with the pork belly.

It's quite nice, but I thought it wasn't as good as an appetiser coz it didn't really 开胃？

Had their snapper fillet and its ginormous. 

Below the fillet there's still cous cous! 

It tastes really good with the tangy sauce and the fish meat was tender.

Recommended! :)

Mille-freue with coconut ice cream! 

Dessert is always my fav part of the meal hehe

Photo with 大坏蛋!

We went Bugis to walk walk after the meal and she bought Tuk Tuk Cha

And then! She had bad cramps and we had to go home...

Why is it every time we go out something crops up!! zzzzz

But is ok la, I had a good chat with her over lunch. 

Thankful for her :) and that we still keep in contact even though we are no longer in the same organisation.

Boomerang with my FOCC members! 

Glad the Appreciation Tea Ceremony was a success

And with it, comes the end of another chapter. 

好男人

Went out with HuiMin and her bf and her friends on Sat...
We went to sing K and it was a kinda weird combination haha
And had dinner after... was quite fun, it was the first time i spent time with HuiMin outside of work.
In a way, our friendship also started quite oddly.
I can't rmb when we became friends to be honest lol
I only rmb we had a convo during FOCC outing in Dec last yr, when she was a volunteer and she mentioned she wanna intro some friends to me LOL
Nevertheless, I'm glad I made a friend in HuiMin :)
It's really rare, ever since HJ left, I've been pretty miserable...
It's kinda rare to find someone you can click, and we have a lot of similarities.
She's a Gemini baby too, 2 days after me! But she is 2 years older.

The most memorable thing was when we were at Victoria Secret
And when HM and S were away buying bombshell, her bf and I were waiting outside
He asked me what's my plans for the future? Coz I said I am saving up
I asked him back, and without even skipping a beat, he said:

To start a family with Huimin.

At that moment, I was surprised for a second. To hear someone say something so definitely, without any tinge of hesitation. That's true commitment.
I guess... I've seen too many bad guys? That to meet a good guy actually takes me by surprise.
But there are, HD is one. HM's bf is one.
And he is not just nice to HM but to her friends as well. Throughout the whole afternoon/night, he was concerned over whether I am ok/feel awkward? And makes convo.
Haha kindness and genuineness, that's the most impt trait I am looking for.
I guess, I'll just have to keep believing.

Really happy for HuiMin. :)
钟韵认可哦 哈哈哈


______________________________

不知什么时候，我才能完全放下。
一場靈魂相知相識卻終難成同行伴侶的愛戀，永遠是最淒美的情歌故事。

Turning into a Work Zombie

My mum called me at work today, which is kinda rare (we message but seldom call)

And the reason she called was to ask me if i buying cake.

Throughout the whole conversation, I was thinking: 'Why is she calling about cakes?'

It only dawned on me after I was about to make my way to Orchard...

Today is my mum's birthday. 

The convo below with HuiMin sums up my entire dialogue within:

HAHAHA

started using telegram recently and the stickers are so cuteeee~

Bought Rive Gauche Strawberry Shortcake back to celebrate my mum birthday.

Can't believe she is 51, as I age, sometimes I forget my parents are aging too.

Life hasn't been the best to me recently

I feel like my anxieties are back, mostly due to work stress

which affects my physical health. 

I feel like a pampered little girl who can't take stress at times, when I am really trying my best to adapt

Maybe I shld just admit it, I'm not happy here and stop being so afraid to take a leap of faith

Perhaps the best thing this month, is meeting Pang. 

The first 3 months of 2017 has been a whirlwind, with people entering and leaving my life within days/weeks. 

JJ, David, YL, Mr Blue.

Through it all, I think Pang maybe the best thing to have happened so far.

It's too early to say, i'm really just letting things be. 

But for now, I'm thankful. 

Thank you.