Goodbye and Hello.

A lot of things happened and the scariest of all are humans.
The things that humans can do, its frightening.
Honestly, i don't understand why there are hypocrites and backstabbers in this world.
A world without them would be much peaceful won't it?
But i guess, everything in life needs a balance.

For e.g, no one would ever put a limit on happiness achieved right?
However, what's truly ironic is the only way to attain happiness is to put a lid on happiness itself.
Sometimes, you need to experience the bitterness in life before you can fully appreciate happiness.
Ever thought of things this way??

And its finally reached the last lap.
I am super freaking scared.
But what's gonna come will come.
And all i can do is to do my best, work hard and not let myself down.

At least if things turn out for the worst,
I have the reassurance that i did my best, no regrets.

Can I??



OMG!! Received VERY exciting news during hist consultation today.
Miss oon said there was this yr end hist overseas trip to both VIETNAM and JAPAN.
OMG OMG OMG!!
:)
It's not official yet and they are only going to announce it after promos.
BUT, i really really REALLY wanna go.
I'm gonna try to persuade my dad.
This is like the only happy thing in my life right now.
Gave a fuzzy-wuzzy feeling.
Is this how happiness feels like??
o.O

Para-no-id.

Scared, freaking scared.
T.T


I really hate this, man.

12.58

It's 12.58am now.
And i'm still awake, haha
Not a result of mugging too hard, instead, i'm still finding time to slack.
:/

Went JE library to mug with mama and jiaqiang just now.
Was not really that productive but at least i finished 1 chem note.
*trying hard to persuade myself*
LOL!

Gonna go novena tmr to discuss our hist project.
Hope everything turns out fine, hee.

Perhaps, it was never an issue of how long a person stayed in my life.
Rather, it was the fact that i was given the chance to meet her, no matter how short or significant that was.
Really, everyone of you made an impact in my life.
And you know i would have done anything, if there could be anything done, to change things from how they are now.
But sometimes, things happened due to mutual feelings.
And i think, perhaps, our moment have just passed us by.

Fainting spells.

Yesterday, i nearly fainted and it scared the hell out of me.
:(

I was planning to bathe when suddenly, the world started spinning around me.
The sudden dizziness was overwhelming and i could have just collapsed if not for the door being just beside me.
For a spilt second or so, i blacked-out with my head on the sink tabletop.
When i regained consciousness, the world was still spinning and my vision was a blur.
What's worse was there was this constant ringing in my ears and i can't hear anything else besides that.
I managed to drag myself out of the toliet and lied on the bed until i felt better.

After that horrifying experience,
i immediately called dad.
It seriously freaked me out!!!

Im gonna go see a doc tmr with mum.
Not sure if this is being paranoid, but its better to be safe than sorry right?

Ramblings:

I just realised that those sad and cinderella-like drama serials can only be filmed in asia and with asian actors/actresses.
Simply coz westerners, esp females, are stronger and more independent, thus they can't really portray out the meekness needed in the female leads in this drama shows.
Just imagine, Megan Fox replacing Song Hye Gyo in the drama show ' Autumn tales.'
OMG!!

Afraid.

Learn from your experiences,
that's what everyone says.
But things seems to work otherwise for me.

If you've already experienced smth,
you shld not be afraid of the same thing right?
But, i'm afraid.
I'm afraid of being close to someone and relying on them,
only to have them leave my life again.

I dunno what's the prob.
But pple ard me always seems to leave me.
Perhaps, there's smth very wrong with me.
That's why i'm always losing pple.

And then, i learn to move on after a long time.
Coz there's no use pining on smth thats gone.

But the vicious cycle never stops.
And i'm afraid, of the past replaying in the future.

Mac breakfast & history madness.

Today was such a long day.
Woke up at 6.30 am to eat breakfast with bok and hilda.
HAHA.
We met at KAP and i had my first mac big breakfast.
Not bad, and was super filling.

Went back to sch after breakfast and the whole day can be summed up with:
HISTORY MADNESS.
8.30-10am: SEA
10am-11.30am: International
1.30pm-4pm: International
WOW.
I'm still wondering how i survived through it all.
HAHAHA

But it was rather fun,
coz me and bok were not listening.
haha
we were chatting and laughing down there.
So time passed by rather quickly.

After hist, went tanjong pagar for facial.
I haven't done facial for a super long time and it still hurts like crazy.
sigh.

Ok, another day wasted with nth done.
I have a schedule for the rest of this pathetic holiday week:
9/9/09 (omg, i didn't realise tmr is 9th sep'09. Cool.) : Mug. Can't believe i'm spending such a special date mugging. Sigh.
10/9/09: Mug
11/9/09: Go kampong. Help out with Hilda PW. Go home and mug again.
12/9/09: Mug.
13/9/09: Mug and tuition.

What a GREAT holiday.
:)

Nobody's going to help you, unless you help yourself.

Need to give myself a push.
You know what's making me more stressed?
The fact that i'm not that stressed about promos when its just barely 3 wks away.
And the fact that i'm lagging behind in EVERYTHING with my recent failures in maths [Prob hist when i receive it back later.]
T.T

BUCK UP, ZHONGYUN!!!!!!!!!

NO ONE"S GOING TO HELP YOU, UNLESS YOU HELP YOURSELF.